During the Covid pandemic, with so much uncertainty around, we are bound to speculate what the future holds for our physical health, financial problems, families and social lives.
Our brains are amazing tools, designed to solve problems, to anticipate, plan and organise. But at times of stress, we often search in vain for the off-switch, our thoughts multiplying, creating emotional turmoil and warping our sense of perspective. We can easily mistake our fearful fantasies for reality.
One of the current priorities is keeping a safe physical distance from other people. But we also need to keep a safe distance from our thoughts.
When a fearful thought pops up, it the body reacts with the stress hormone cortisol, which actually fuels more fearful thoughts. This can create a vicious spiral where we are speculating, obsessing and worrying far beyond any point which may be useful. Even if we realise this, there seems to be no way out. We try to relax or think of other things, but fighting with our worries rarely works.
How do we achieve some relief from this suffocating mental torment? Many spiritual teachers have pointed to the simple yet radical shift that can come when we dis-identify from our thinking process, when we realise that we are not our thoughts.
This shift is not always easy to make, and it may be the work of a lifetime, but this is a great time to start. We may begin by noticing our mental reactions to stimuli, whether it be conversations, news items or your own trains of thought. It may be that your insights only come after the event, for instance “I rushed to judgment”, “I was catastrophising” or “I beat myself up”, but slowly we can begin to see and understand our own mental and emotional patterns and reactive tendencies. It can help to write things down in a book, noting down your ‘triggers’, your own inner narratives and self-talk.
Gradually we learn to watch our patterns as they play out, whether it is our ‘voice in the head’ or during conversations. We become attentive to our sometimes ingrained thought processes, noticing how they interact with our emotions as they bubble up.
The aim is to become the compassionate watcher of our own minds, rather than completely falling for the stories they like to weave. Rather than trying to banish uncomfortable thoughts, we allow them to be, no longer energising them with futile attempts at resistance. Throughout all this, it is very important to treat our fretful minds with kindness, rather than judgment. As commonly advised in mindfulness, bringing some attention to the breath and/or body throughout this process is very helpful.
Of course thinking is not the enemy. The ability to speculate and hypothesize have enabled us to survive and thrive as a species, but thinking can easily become compulsive and this can only drain us of energy and limit our effectiveness.
Once you loosen your attachment to thought patterns, you may find that you become more open to new perspectives. This can lead to the unravelling of some tightly-held beliefs and opinions that no-longer seem relevant. As this happens you may experience some uncertainty and resistance. Once again, the technique is to treat any fear or uncertainty with acceptance and compassion. You are starting to taste freedom.
Just like staying physically safe, we can do ourselves a world of good by maintaining a sensible distance from our thoughts in order that we are not overwhelmed by them.
This post was inspired by a video from the spiritual teacher Mooji
Tom George 